Understanding Anxiety: A Layered Approach

To comprehend anxiety, we will peel back the layers, starting from the most superficial symptoms and causes until we reach the core of our anxiety.

Traditional medical approaches to treating anxiety include several methods, which we will explore as we dig deeper. While these methods can be beneficial, they often fail to address the root causes of anxiety.

The most basic form of treatment is medication. This can be helpful for individuals experiencing severe anxiety, but it does not tackle the underlying issues. It may temporarily alleviate anxiety, providing brief clarity.

Next, we consider thought-based therapies, which allow individuals to modify their thought patterns. This empowering technique can be practiced independently and is frequently utilized.

These therapies can be particularly effective in specific situations, such as preparing for a presentation or facing an exam, where altering our thought process beforehand can mitigate anxiety.

However, while these techniques may address immediate triggers, the underlying anxiety continues to reside in our subconscious, waiting for new stimuli to surface.

To truly address anxiety, we must understand why certain thoughts provoke it.

Delving Deeper into Anxiety's Causes

The next layer involves looking inward, beyond thoughts, through practices like meditation and mindfulness. These techniques help calm our thoughts, enabling us to navigate life more effectively. As we gain control over our thoughts, our emotional and physical experiences become clearer.

Meditation is invaluable for calming the mind and, in doing so, addresses anxiety. Similar to changing our thoughts, it removes immediate triggers.

Additionally, meditation allows us to connect with our feelings, enabling us to recognize bodily sensations associated with anxiety. We might notice tightness in the chest, shallow breathing, or other signs of our anxiety.

Through meditation, we can observe these symptoms without judgment, simply experiencing them. As we enhance our concentration, it becomes easier to identify the proximal causes of our anxiety.

For instance, tightness in the chest may trigger worry, leading to increased anxiety. Alternatively, the fear of feeling anxious can create a cycle of anxiety itself.

Mindful breathing can also be beneficial. Shallow, rapid breaths signal our body’s stress response, while deep, controlled breathing can help alleviate anxiety.

These practices can transform our relationship with anxiety. Over time, as we reduce negative thought patterns and apply non-judgment, we can develop strategies to manage anxiety, such as deep breathing or engaging in self-reflection.

While anxiety may persist, its grip on us diminishes as we learn to recognize our inherent worthiness of love and acceptance.

Exploring the Deeper Roots of Anxiety

Anxiety serves as a form of communication, revealing two key messages.

Firstly, it indicates a desire for something. For example, the wish to excel in a test often brings anxiety. Some students may attempt to alleviate anxiety by feigning indifference toward outcomes—this can be a temporary fix but not a sustainable solution.

Secondly, anxiety signals uncertainty. It arises from not knowing what the future holds.

Will we perform poorly on the test? Will our presentation be successful? Will we secure the job we desire? Will our project yield the expected results?

The answers remain elusive until the moment arrives.

Much anxious thought revolves around navigating the unknown. We may prepare obsessively, trying to eliminate as many uncertainties as possible. Occasionally, this meticulous preparation pays off.

For example, discovering the answers to an exam or the interview questions can diminish anxiety in those scenarios.

Exposure therapy is a common approach to manage anxiety by gradually familiarizing individuals with what they fear, transforming the unknown into the known.

However, what if we cannot ascertain safety? From an evolutionary perspective, anxiety serves a purpose.

Moreover, what if we seek significant life changes, leading us into uncharted territories?

Is exposure therapy applicable to every unknown?

At the deepest level, we find a method that addresses anxiety’s fundamental roots, although it may be challenging to accept.

The Ultimate Root and the Path to Healing

Among the two facets of anxiety—want and uncertainty—we’ve examined the unknown. The ultimate root, however, lies in our attachment to our desires.

Students desire good grades, but often become attached to them. Job seekers crave fulfilling employment, yet many develop an attachment to that goal. Similarly, romantic partners may yearn to be together, resulting in attachment.

What fuels this attachment?

It is not the desire itself. A grade, in essence, is merely a number in a database. What we truly seek is what that number signifies.

For many students, a good grade reflects self-worth. Praise from a boss or validation from a partner can also be perceived in the same light.

We cling to these things because we believe they are essential for our self-worth. This quest for validation stems from another unknown:

What is it that we fail to understand?

We often do not recognize our inherent worthiness of unconditional love, which exists independent of circumstances. Lacking this knowledge, we perceive love as conditional and fear its loss, mistaking acceptance from others for true love. If we realized our worthiness of unconditional love, our concerns about grades or opinions would diminish. We could still achieve these things but without the burden of attachment.

Our anxiety to perform well in exams mirrors our frantic search for love. At its core, this anxiety reflects a fear that we are unworthy of love.

Why do we struggle to comprehend our worthiness of love?

We have often received conditional love based on our behavior and thoughts, instilling a fear of inadequacy and the possibility of love being withheld.

Unaware of our unconditional worth, we cling to superficial tokens of affection—often mere pleasurable feelings.

Our actions are driven by this fear, which manifests as attachment, perpetuated across generations.

Unlike the fear of the unknown, this deeper fear challenges our fundamental sense of self-worth.

How can we confront this root of anxiety to achieve lasting healing?

The answer lies in the choice we make each moment: do we act from love or fear? Embracing love can lead to healing.

Choosing love is the key. It may seem simple, but it is incredibly challenging. We face countless moments each day, making it nearly impossible to consistently choose love.

Moreover, experiencing unconditional love is rare, requiring us to seek it within ourselves. However, the journey is worthwhile; with persistence, we can improve.

Some may dismiss this concept as naïve, overly sentimental, or absurd.

Those of us grounded in scientific reasoning might question the subjective nature of such an approach—how can one measure this objectively?

Those entrenched in the business world might argue that love does not drive productivity, insisting that action is what matters.

Five years ago, had someone shared this perspective with me, I would have likely found it ludicrous. It’s only through personal experience that I’ve recognized its validity.

If you resonate with my past skepticism, I urge you to try this approach wholeheartedly before passing judgment. What have you got to lose?

Public Speaking Through the Lens of Love

Despite decades of experience with presentations, I still face anxiety. Eventually, I uncovered the core of my unease. I had processed thoughts and sensations, which provided some relief, but anxiety lingered.

What I realized was that many of my presentations lacked love.

Often, I didn’t genuinely care about the topics I was presenting, viewing them merely as assignments or lectures. I was often motivated by the desire for validation from my audience (such as good grades or acknowledgment of my skills).

I was preoccupied with proving my worth.

My presentations were driven by fear, a constant undercurrent that I had become blind to.

By chance, I discovered the power of presenting with love. When I began delivering presentations that truly mattered to me—those aimed at benefiting my audience through valuable insights—I naturally emanated love.

My focus shifted from myself to my audience, and my anxiety significantly diminished.

Now, instead of worrying about how I am perceived, I concentrate on what I offer to my audience. Am I projecting fear, seeking their approval? Or am I radiating love, eager to share my knowledge?

When I feel anxious now, I remind myself of the true purpose of my presentations—it’s not about me; it’s about spreading love.

While anxiety remains a part of my life, its hold continues to weaken as I learn that I am deserving of love, irrespective of my circumstances.

Choosing Love Over Fear: A Daily Practice

In every moment, we face a choice: love or fear. While it may sound cliché, I encourage you to explore this concept until you genuinely understand it.

We often gravitate toward fear-based actions—these require less energy and have become the norm. Fear can easily become our default setting.

However, love offers a pathway to healing.

There is no pill that can cure anxiety, nor will there ever be, as love cannot be externally generated.

Love is a conscious choice we must make. Whether we are interacting with others, creating, studying, or simply existing, every moment can be infused with love.

We must continually choose love in our daily lives.

Each decision to act with love facilitates healing for ourselves and those around us. If we were to embrace love in every aspect of our lives, what else might we heal?

Could we alleviate jealousy? Combat depression? Reduce hatred?

What societal transformations might emerge? Less corruption? Decreased violence? Increased generosity?

Although it may be impossible to act from love in every moment, the pursuit is worthwhile. We can still utilize various anxiety management techniques, including medication and exposure therapy, while grounding our efforts in love.

Only love can penetrate to the deepest roots of our struggles.

Confront your fears. Choose love. What do you have to lose?

Conclusion

From superficial treatments like medication and thought modification to uprooting anxiety through love, we can understand how anxiety operates and how to fully heal from it.

There are various methods for addressing anxiety at different levels, each of which can be beneficial. However, for lasting change, we must delve into the root causes.

We need to confront our own fears of unworthiness and recognize that we are truly deserving of unconditional love.

We can actively practice this in every moment by choosing to act from love. This choice serves as a means of healing, enabling us to release our fears. Ultimately, love is an act of will.

Without choice, love does not exist.

If love has the power to heal anxiety, what else might it be capable of healing?

Jealousy? Hatred? Depression?

Confront your fears. Choose love. What do you have to lose?

This article was originally published in Prajna Life Coaching’s Blog on July 7th, 2021. Prajna Life Coaching’s mission is to discover meaning and joy in this chaotic world through balance and wisdom.